In last week’s Blog I mentioned that life is like a mirror and what we put out there we attract, this is particularly true with horses and this picture sums up that relationship beautifully. However I don’t think this just applies to horses. I think it is also true of human behaviour and last week I mentioned how behaviour breeds behaviour.
If we are happy this can be infectious and our happiness radiates and shines outwards. Equally if we are around someone who is moody this can also affect us and we can soon absorb negativity if we let it in and allow it. It really is that simple. You may recall that last week I was not looking forward to Monday at all.
Anyway, back to the picture. My regular readers will recall the difficulties I experienced when I first bought my young horse, Bee, at the end of last year. I fell off him very early in our time together and lost my confidence. As a result he lost confidence in me, and being a young horse he needed to be shown the way, he needed a leader. We became edgy and nervous around each other, so much so that I even considered selling him. I started to compare him with my older horse that I had owned for 18 years, I forgot the blood sweat and tears that I experienced with her at the start of our relationship and time together.
My young horse was the sweetest and gentlest horse with perfect manners he just needed a leader and I was not it. I am not one to give up so easily and will usually try to find a way forward but it was not happening with this horse, but something in his eyes and his eagerness to please me didn’t allow me to give up. He hadn’t even done anything wrong we just got off to a shaky start. Luckily I didn’t sell him and together with lots of support from my trainer and friends, we overcame our difficulties and I am pleased to say I can’t imagine life without him. He now trusts me 100% and if I ask or invite him to do something, he trusts it is safe to do so. I am now his leader.
I believe people and animals come into our lives to teach us lessons we need to learn. I’m so grateful to him for teaching me to work at something even through the difficult times, there is always light at the end of the tunnel and once we reach it, it is always brighter than we ever imagined. Bee was never going to be like my 26 year old horse and he stood up for himself, he taught me that we had our own journey to forge.
Last week, I realized that the lesson I learnt could also be applied to my new boss and just like Bee with time and patience, we could hopefully find a way of working together. We are all different and some things can’t be achieved overnight but there is always the promise and reward that when it happens the light is bright.
To prove a point, I decided to wear a smile all week, I noticed people smiling at me on the train home – I counted five people one evening which is quite a feat considering the majority of people stare at their phones for most of their journey.
Equally, I was determined to turn the work situation around. I chose not to react to any negativity and decided to remain positive under all circumstances, nothing was going to penetrate my happiness or get under my skin. I chose to keep smiling. By the end of the week, rather miraculously, my boss was thanking me for my work and effort and even said I was amazing.
I wondered what had changed and I recall seeing this photo with the horse and it reminded me of the struggles I’d had with Bee at the start of our time together and realized that this applies to all relationships and situations in our lives. I have always been a firm believer that behaviour breeds behaviour. If someone is grumpy with us as a rule we will be grumpy back, if someone smiles at us we smile back, not to mention time and patience.
So it’s worth remembering that what we put out there comes back tenfold and if anyone is really struggling with something or someone in their life at the moment, try a different tactic with a new approach, you might be surprised at how quickly you can turn a situation around. I know I was.
I would love to hear from you and how you turned a negative situation around and the results you achieved.
Wishing all my lovely readers a week full of love and happiness.
Sonia DECONINCK said:
I remember how nastily my husband’s ex-wife had welcomed me when we first met.
I couldn’t understand why since she was the one who had left Bernard alone. Maybe because although she did not want to live with him any more, she was against him divorcing her (???)….
Anyway, she picked up every opportunity given to her to make me feel how malicious she was. I did not want to stir troubles around by responding briskly – as she would have deserved….
Since she was really making me walk on eggshells, I decided to counteract with kind feelings. At their son’s wedding, I came up to her, kissed her and congratulated her warmly for this achievement, sharing – as a mother myself – her concern for her son’s happiness. She looked quite aback, surprised…. and ashamed. At least it’s what she said to me the next morning, offering apologies.
We are not friends but since that day she has always shown me respect and good will…
Tracey Marie said:
That’s exactly what I meant Sonia, sometimes we have to rise above people’s negativity or in this case nastiness, it really does work and we can still continue to feel good about life. If only everyone spread love and happiness.